Let me show step by step process of how I have helped my client change their belief so you understand how to change your beliefs.
1. Find the core negative belief
There are thousands of negative beliefs in our minds about money. Obviously, you can not change them all. And be advised that every day your mind creates new beliefs. It’s a funny situation, you’ve changed one negative belief to a positive, and your mind just has created a new negative one because today you have come across some money problem (e.g., your kid asked you for money and you rejected and then all day long you suffered blaming yourself)
When I started working with my clients in 2011-2012 on a money mindset, I tried to change as many negative beliefs as possible. But later, I discovered a much more effective strategy. I discovered that there are few core beliefs that lie in the foundation of the money mindset. And if we find them and change them, that will automatically change hundreds of other negative beliefs.
So, the main challenge is to find them! There is where coaching came into place. When I started my coaching practice, I helped people to find their life purpose and the way in life. I have a gift to feel energy, so I managed to do it successfully. Later I switched to coaching people on money because people were always asking about money. Even when they asked me to help them with life purpose, they wanted to find an occupation where they would make money and not an esoterical non-understandable vague mission in life. People wanted to make money on their life purpose.
So, anyway, all my coaching was connected with money. Indeed, I learned to see what had created money blockages and limitations in people’s minds.
I loved coaching because I was interested in people’s life. In essence, personal development has been my biggest passion in life. So, it has been super exciting to learn the cause-effect process.
- What beliefs caused the failure to make money?
- What beliefs caused the money problems?
In 14 years, I have completed more than 10 000 coach-sessions!
And I can say for sure that core money beliefs were created in childhood. That was the case with me too.
So, to find this core belief, we have to go on a journey to childhood and reveal long-forgotten events and stories, but these events block the money flow for a person for life. And until they don’t change it, they will experience money problems.
For example, one client complained that she couldn’t save money at all. When she has a spare $50, she experiences a huge fear and stress, and she has to spend money to feel relief. She worried that she didn’t have money for a rainy day, but when she saved some money, she experienced colossal discomfort.
What was the real reason for it?
During a coach-session, we discovered a long-forgotten situation in her childhood when she dreamt about a doll. She was 4 years old. She saved penny after penny to accumulate money for a doll. And she eventually had enough money she asked mum to go with her to the shop to buy it.
Believe it or not, her mum convinced her to buy a child pool to play with her brother together. Mum told her that the doll was super expensive and it was a waste of money. She would play for a week with it and forget about it. She trusted her mum, who was very convincing, so she bought the pool. That day she played pool with her brother and was very upset. She didn’t want a pool, and she didn’t like it. They didn’t play pool anymore with her brother, and money was wasted.
She realized that she had betrayed her dream. It was a tragedy for her. She cried every day for a week. She blamed herself and her mum. Since then, she lost trust in her mother and never saved money again.
When she told me this story, she totally had forgotten about it. It seemed like the mind erased this memory, but in coaching, we were able to recover it.
She got two devastating core beliefs due to that situation:
- I can not trust my mum. She deceives me
- Saving money is an extreme pain. You spend years saving money and will eventually buy shit you don’t need.
When I asked her about her relationship with her mum, she told me they had not been speaking to each other for years. That was a topic for our next coach-session.
We found the money-saving blockage. The first and most important step was done.
2. Create a new accurate belief
The tricky thing about this step is to create a belief that the mind would immediately accept. In this case, it will be easy to instill it into the subconscious mind. You can not create some unreal belief because the mind will reject it, and you will fail to instill it. The more believable the belief, the easier it will be to instill it.
She wanted to create a belief: “Saving is a good thing! Saving brings calmness and stability”. I was absolutely sure that the mind would reject it, and she would fail to instill it.
We started from afar.
1. Money is good! Money helps me to make my dreams come true!
Yes! She easily could have believed it. That was mainly true for her.
2. Money is clean. It was not their fault that I had bought the pool instead of the doll. That was me who made the wrong decision.
It was essential to take responsibility for that purchase and realize that money was not responsible for that! Money was clean. They could think or decide anything.
3. I forgive myself for the wrong purchase.
When you take responsibility and fail, you must forgive yourself for the purchase to clear up blame and negative energy.
4. I love money!
This affirmation helped to create a great relationship with money.
5. I have a lot of money!
This is the preliminary step for our final affirmation.
6. I save money because I love money, and money is good!
This is the final belief that changes the core belief. And in this step, we rely on the first and fourth affirmations. If the mind had accepted those beliefs, it would accept this one.
As you see, we need to go through a step-by-step process for changing a core belief. One small step at a time moves us toward the final affirmation. All affirmations are very simple and easy, so it is easy to accept them.
I asked her to do these 6 affirmations for a week! She had difficulties with the third one (I forgive myself for the wrong purchase) and, of course, the final one, but in the next session, I helped her with them, and we proceeded to recover her relationship with her mum.
Of course, this process people can do with a coach only.
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